Recently I have been having mini-bouts of anxiety. Which I notice dwindles down right when I spend time away from everything and just really dig deep into my quiet times.
When I'm quiet, it usually means three things. 1. I am observing. 2. I am reflecting. 3. I am praying. Now, what exactly do I observe, reflect on and what do I pray for?
My surroundings, the people in my direct line of sight, the people that I'm not even looking at, my responses to these people and my environment. Are my responses right, are they wrong, are they wise.
Now don't get me wrong. I don't always do this. There are also many times I plainly zone out. Aisha, a good friend of mine and I confirmed that at times, we process things a little differently than others. Sometimes we process our thoughts and our emotions in an instant, but most of the time we process things within a 24-48 hr. time frame. Just like businesses. Usually it is during this time frame that we hear God whisper. We read the Word. We repent. We apply.
I have come to realize that the anxiety and worries of this world all fade away the closer I get to the Lord. Likewise, when I am far from the Lord, the more anxious and worried about the most minute things that I get.
I have learned to take breathers, I learned to park things, no matter how short or long of a time that may entail. I've learned to toss things Up to the One who actually knows and has the power to do something about things I can no longer carry on my own.
Whenever I do this, everything seems futile. So tiny and insignificant when pitted against my One, True, Love. The greatest man in my life, my Abba Father.
It seems that due to the Valentines hurly burly, a lot of people, myself included have been hungover about relationships; but my focus is more on the relationships that molded me. My immediate family, my church family, colleagues, past hurts, and all others.
I had my quiet time early Sunday morning and it was in Amos 3:3 and 3:7.
It told me that in a family, a church setting, or even in the office and among friend circles, this is how it works. It all boils down to TWO PEOPLE WHO AGREE TO WALK IN THE LORD and the assurance that GOD WILL UNVEIL HIS PLANS TO HIS SERVANTS AND PROPHETS little by little.
Little by little. He doesn't just lays down everything for us. He will however pave the path for us LITTLE BY LITTLE. Just enough wisdom and hope to go on. To continue pressing on, but it is up to Him WHEN AND IF He will tell us His plans. We have to trust though that He will and that even when He doesn't, He is still a good, good Father.
Sometimes my anxiety boils down to the millenial thoughts of I DESIRE THIS. I WANT THIS. I DESERVE THIS. GIVE IT TO ME NOW. Often times, that's when the rifts between people we are in relation with parents-child, boss-employee, siblings, friends, customer-waiter happens and more often than not, when things are fueled by anxiety and this immediate rush, things end up failing. We say and do things we shouldn't have. We often end up regretting the hasty and harsh words that came out of our mouths and the actions that followed right after.
Yesterday's preaching cemented this early Sunday quiet time in reminding me that UNITY IS OF THE ESSENCE. We have to see eye to eye. Perhaps not always and not on everything, but we must be united on the core things and during crucial times, so that the Glory of God radiates and pours out in overflow to our surroundings.
I can write so much more about the whispers of God. I probably would, but for now.. Lunch. And yes, naa siyay kalamunggay. HAHAHA
I leave you with this and I pray that it helps you deal with this Manic Monday and the rest of the week.
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
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