Oh Daughter of Eve | Embrace Being a Woman

The other day a good friend of mine surprised me. I was reading or probably staring into oblivion and someone back-hugged me and it truly made my day. You know the kind that you thought only happens in K-dramas. Now before any of my avid readers squeal with glee, it's not what you think. Prayers pa more for me to ever publish THE ONE here. That blog already has a draft and a working title of TOTGA: The One That God Allowed. Not today though, not today. 

Going back to the other day. I usually don't like surprises. That's why in any given establishment, I always have to face the door. Specially if I'm with my siblings or lady friends. I am always alert. If there is any danger coming toward, like water about to be spilled, I will be the first to guard and shield you from it.

You will only see me seated with my back to the door if: 1. I am with my father. 2. I am with a male relative or friend that I trust my life with. 3. I am with that person that God allowed.

It can be tiresome at times. To be both woman and man in a world that requires it. We live in a world where some fathers are abroad leaving their wives and children fatherless and needing to grow up and fend for themselves. If you never experienced this, good for you. Thank God for having that solid male presence in your life growing up.

However, the realization that women are privileged enough to receive hugs and reciprocate is something that we women should relish in. It is something that not even men can have. I mean you hardly see a man hug or touch a fellow man. Specially in our society that manning up is so well praised.

Yet I do admire men who are expressive, who let people in. Men who unlike most, do welcome correction and guidance. Specially when you see how they are towards their mothers and sisters. Who are gentle with children and babies. I do notice these things and I do take note. How you are to the women in your nuclear family will be how you are to me and those important to me.

I do also admire men who are cautious and mindful of their actions and are clear with their intentions. Who know when to extend a gentlemanly gesture and when to hold back to protect myself or a friend. Now don't get me wrong, I come from a family of huggers. We are very Western that way. I find holding hands and a quick or tight long hug with family and close friends a norm.

I do however try to keep this warmth to fellow ladies as it may give other people the wrong message. Specially men. I remember an instance when a guy from church confessed that he liked me and that he thought I liked him too. 

When I asked why, he said because every Sunday or every fellowship I would smile at him and at times tap his shoulder ever so quickly to give him his share of snacks. Which shocked me. I am an usher and Kids Church teacher so we always have this motto, give your best smile. Keep your energy up. Whatever it takes.

Being warm is a good thing. Yet it can also very easily, get so misconstrued. Several Sundays after that shocking revelation, I would control my smile and my good friend Neil approaches me, and says "Huy Res, are you okay? Why are you frowning? There are church attendees coming in, best smile diba?" and I quickly told him the matter at hand in a hushed and muttered breath that he needed to cover me so I can smile and not make that guy fall even further. Though here's the thing. It takes 2 to tango. Men need to protect women. Women need to protect men. 

To be honest, not being able to smile killed me inside. Dramatic I know. Yet not giving my brightest smile, is just not me. I always faced life with a smile. I always smiled. I smiled even if my life was falling apart. I smiled even if it was only God and my closest siblings in Christ that knew I was truly devastated. 

Oh daughter of Eve, don't ever be afraid to smile. Don't ever be afraid to show warmth. Don't ever be afraid to shed a tear because that is how God made you to be. Let the right people in. The right ones will know how to keep you smiling, or how to bring it back. The right ones will know when it's also not genuine. The right ones will know how to cry with you. The right ones will cheer you on and will know how best to let you grow to become the woman He has called you to be.

        

                                        "You are altogether beautiful, my love;
                                                        there is no flaw in you."   

                                                          Song of Solomon 4:7

When God Whispers | Peace Over Anxiety | Unveiling Plans

So I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. (I mean what's new?) But more than thinking, I've been doing a lot of praying and a lot of seeking. I've been shutting out some noise to make sure I am still keen to hearing His voice. 

Recently I have been having mini-bouts of anxiety. Which I notice dwindles down right when I spend time away from everything and just really dig deep into my quiet times. 

When I'm quiet, it usually means three things. 1. I am observing. 2. I am reflecting. 3. I am praying. Now, what exactly do I observe, reflect on and what do I pray for? My surroundings, the people in my direct line of sight, the people that I'm not even looking at, my responses to these people and my environment. Are my responses right, are they wrong, are they wise. 

Now don't get me wrong. I don't always do this. There are also many times I plainly zone out. Aisha, a good friend of mine and I confirmed that at times, we process things a little differently than others. Sometimes we process our thoughts and our emotions in an instant, but most of the time we process things within a 24-48 hr. time frame. Just like businesses. Usually it is during this time frame that we hear God whisper. We read the Word. We repent. We apply. 

I have come to realize that the anxiety and worries of this world all fade away the closer I get to the Lord. Likewise, when I am far from the Lord, the more anxious and worried about the most minute things that I get. I have learned to take breathers, I learned to park things, no matter how short or long of a time that may entail. I've learned to toss things Up to the One who actually knows and has the power to do something about things I can no longer carry on my own.

Whenever I do this, everything seems futile. So tiny and insignificant when pitted against my One, True, Love. The greatest man in my life, my Abba Father. 

It seems that due to the Valentines hurly burly, a lot of people, myself included have been hungover about relationships; but my focus is more on the relationships that molded me. My immediate family, my church family, colleagues, past hurts, and all others. 

I had my quiet time early Sunday morning and it was in Amos 3:3 and 3:7.

Though I understand that this verse is commonly used during weddings or couple anniversaries, these verses spoke to me differently. 

It told me that in a family, a church setting, or even in the office and among friend circles, this is how it works. It all boils down to TWO PEOPLE WHO AGREE TO WALK IN THE LORD and the assurance that GOD WILL UNVEIL HIS PLANS TO HIS SERVANTS AND PROPHETS little by little. 

Little by little. He doesn't just lays down everything for us. He will however pave the path for us LITTLE BY LITTLE. Just enough wisdom and hope to go on. To continue pressing on, but it is up to Him WHEN AND IF He will tell us His plans. We have to trust though that He will and that even when He doesn't, He is still a good, good Father.

Sometimes my anxiety boils down to the millenial thoughts of I DESIRE THIS. I WANT THIS. I DESERVE THIS. GIVE IT TO ME NOW. Often times, that's when the rifts between people we are in relation with parents-child, boss-employee, siblings, friends, customer-waiter happens and more often than not, when things are fueled by anxiety and this immediate rush, things end up failing. We say and do things we shouldn't have. We often end up regretting the hasty and harsh words that came out of our mouths and the actions that followed right after.

Yesterday's preaching cemented this early Sunday quiet time in reminding me that UNITY IS OF THE ESSENCE. We have to see eye to eye. Perhaps not always and not on everything, but we must be united on the core things and during crucial times, so that the Glory of God radiates and pours out in overflow to our surroundings. 

I can write so much more about the whispers of God. I probably would, but for now.. Lunch. And yes, naa siyay kalamunggay. HAHAHA

I leave you with this and I pray that it helps you deal with this Manic Monday and the rest of the week.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7