Oh Daughter of Eve | Embrace Being a Woman

The other day a good friend of mine surprised me. I was reading or probably staring into oblivion and someone back-hugged me and it truly made my day. You know the kind that you thought only happens in K-dramas. Now before any of my avid readers squeal with glee, it's not what you think. Prayers pa more for me to ever publish THE ONE here. That blog already has a draft and a working title of TOTGA: The One That God Allowed. Not today though, not today. 

Going back to the other day. I usually don't like surprises. That's why in any given establishment, I always have to face the door. Specially if I'm with my siblings or lady friends. I am always alert. If there is any danger coming toward, like water about to be spilled, I will be the first to guard and shield you from it.

You will only see me seated with my back to the door if: 1. I am with my father. 2. I am with a male relative or friend that I trust my life with. 3. I am with that person that God allowed.

It can be tiresome at times. To be both woman and man in a world that requires it. We live in a world where some fathers are abroad leaving their wives and children fatherless and needing to grow up and fend for themselves. If you never experienced this, good for you. Thank God for having that solid male presence in your life growing up.

However, the realization that women are privileged enough to receive hugs and reciprocate is something that we women should relish in. It is something that not even men can have. I mean you hardly see a man hug or touch a fellow man. Specially in our society that manning up is so well praised.

Yet I do admire men who are expressive, who let people in. Men who unlike most, do welcome correction and guidance. Specially when you see how they are towards their mothers and sisters. Who are gentle with children and babies. I do notice these things and I do take note. How you are to the women in your nuclear family will be how you are to me and those important to me.

I do also admire men who are cautious and mindful of their actions and are clear with their intentions. Who know when to extend a gentlemanly gesture and when to hold back to protect myself or a friend. Now don't get me wrong, I come from a family of huggers. We are very Western that way. I find holding hands and a quick or tight long hug with family and close friends a norm.

I do however try to keep this warmth to fellow ladies as it may give other people the wrong message. Specially men. I remember an instance when a guy from church confessed that he liked me and that he thought I liked him too. 

When I asked why, he said because every Sunday or every fellowship I would smile at him and at times tap his shoulder ever so quickly to give him his share of snacks. Which shocked me. I am an usher and Kids Church teacher so we always have this motto, give your best smile. Keep your energy up. Whatever it takes.

Being warm is a good thing. Yet it can also very easily, get so misconstrued. Several Sundays after that shocking revelation, I would control my smile and my good friend Neil approaches me, and says "Huy Res, are you okay? Why are you frowning? There are church attendees coming in, best smile diba?" and I quickly told him the matter at hand in a hushed and muttered breath that he needed to cover me so I can smile and not make that guy fall even further. Though here's the thing. It takes 2 to tango. Men need to protect women. Women need to protect men. 

To be honest, not being able to smile killed me inside. Dramatic I know. Yet not giving my brightest smile, is just not me. I always faced life with a smile. I always smiled. I smiled even if my life was falling apart. I smiled even if it was only God and my closest siblings in Christ that knew I was truly devastated. 

Oh daughter of Eve, don't ever be afraid to smile. Don't ever be afraid to show warmth. Don't ever be afraid to shed a tear because that is how God made you to be. Let the right people in. The right ones will know how to keep you smiling, or how to bring it back. The right ones will know when it's also not genuine. The right ones will know how to cry with you. The right ones will cheer you on and will know how best to let you grow to become the woman He has called you to be.

        

                                        "You are altogether beautiful, my love;
                                                        there is no flaw in you."   

                                                          Song of Solomon 4:7

On choosing to love.. As He chose to love us.

Wow it's 2014! Nope this isn't my annual Valentines Letter to God knows who yet. It's just a spur of the moment blog on some thoughts.

So lately I've been so busy. Yes with my sisters and ministry but more on helping in the preparations of one of my closest friend's wedding which happens tomorrow. 

Being with the bride while meeting her suppliers over the past months, dealing with the stress alongside her and her groom, and rejoicing in the joy they're experiencing as the day nears got me thinking. Yes about marriage and love in general.

A lot of people involved in the wedding preparations have said to me, "Grabe noh? Maid of Honor ka pero parang coordinator ka na rin. Na-apil pud kag kastress. Ikaw, kelan ba yung sayo?" I'd laugh and say "Oh don't worry. You'll definitely know. Kasi icocopy paste ko lang tong lahat ng preparations for Geri's wedding when that happens. That is if the husband agrees and if the husband (Piolo) finally finds out. HAHA" 

Seriously, I find it amusing that I can be in high spirits and so humorous when I respond that way. Perhaps because I know that it's all in God's good timing and when it happens for me, all Glory goes to Him. If you were to ask me if I would be ready to get married if someone proposed to me tomorrow, I'd say of course not. You see, saying YES to such a life changing event bares the responsibility that will affect not only you and that man but the generation that follows in that marriage. Then again, nobody is every fully ready until it happens. So this waiting period which others dread, I consider it God's grace. His grace of preparation until that time comes. Until that person comes.

Many of you know that I drive. Last year, during a flesh and spirit battle I had to basically pull over to the side of the national highway as I drove myself home. In tears I cried out to God and said this prayer "Lord I will let go. Not because I find it easy but because I know you have a great plan for me. I know I deserve someone who will choose me. Not confused. Not playing it safe but someone who will choose me the way You chose me. Who will see me and know I'm his. The way You saw me and just knew. Someone who will take a risk with me the way You took a risk with me many years ago knowing full well that I may not even accept You, but you still risked it all for me. Because I am worth it."

Many people think that when they get saved, it's because they chose God. But when I came to know Christ, I knew it wasn't me. Because if my salvation was something I could do for myself, then when I feel like turning my back on God and I just don't want any of this Christianity thing anymore, then I can take matters into my own hands and unsave myself. But I did play a role. I accepted the invitation. Even Scripture backs this up in John 15:16 Jesus says “You did not choose Me but I chose you.” 

Tomorrow I will be witnessing two people exchange their vows. Two people who CHOSE each other as God chose them to be a part of His family. Tomorrow I will be smiling, laughing, probably crying but all in joy. 

Then I go home fresh from it and work on that Valentines Letter that I know some of you guys have been waiting for.  When it's done, I'll link it here. Til then, Happy Valentines everyone! :))

OFF LIMITS

Found this on the blog of H. A. Paulsen, author of "Emotional Purity: An Affair of the Heart." (which by the way is a very2x good read). Very insightful. Helped me bring to light some things in my life and I pray that you be blessed with this blog as well. -ressa (I have put the thing which I agreed with, and my personal thoughts at the end, in BOLD.) 


OFF LIMITS (http://emotionalpurity.blogspot.com/2011/03/030411-off-limits.html)

"God, no You can't ask that of me!"

"God, really You want me to change that!"

"God, You can't really want me to say that!

What are your "off limits" to God: singleness, mission field, being barren, moving, finding a new job in this awful economy, a new group of friends, a ministry at your local church, overeating, an anti-depressant, repairing a broken relationship, or down sizing so you can be a stay at home mom?

What are you afraid to let go of?

As soon as something becomes "off limits" to God, it becomes an idol in our life. It's really that simple! We're choosing the flesh over the Spirit. We're choosing our way over God's way. We're thinking we know what's best for our life, our family or our church.

Surrender is a process in the Christian walk, not an easy one, but an essential one to mature in faith!

And remember the things that God is calling you to let go of, maybe totally different than what He's calling someone else to...so no judgement, no being critical, just trust that they are on their path towards surrender! (Preaching that to myself!)